In the first stockholder vote on executive pay by a major U.S. company, Aflac shareholders approved almost $15 million in compensation for Chairman and Chief Executive Dan Amos. If he has any sense of decency, he’ll give half of that money to the duck.
Food market analysts say the next wave of price increases at the grocery store will be for chicken and pork. If you’re a fan of pulled pork, look for packages that shoppers have been fighting over.
Banks in Japan are increasing their efforts to attract Middle East oil money. For every new account an Arab oil sheik opens, he’ll receive a toaster delivered personally by 400 Geisha girls.
Executives at Mr. Softee, one of the last companies remaining selling ice cream from trucks, say rising fuel costs will force them to hike prices this summer. If that doesn’t work, drivers are instructed to turn up the annoying music and convince customers to buy extra cones to shove in their ears.
New Cuban President Raul Castro has authorized the first legal sales of home computers in his country, allowing Cuban citizens to finally have access to the Internet. They’ll now be able to watch Cuban boxers in the Olympics, Cuban baseball players in Yankees games and Cuban cigars in porn videos.
The Treasury Department has deposited about $7.1 billion in rebate into the accounts of more than 7.7 million taxpayers so far. These people are easy to spot. They’re the ones who don’t burst into sobs at the gas station when the pump accidentally overflows on the ground.
Wal-Mart Stores announced it’s expanding its low-priced drug program, and will now offer certain 90-day generic prescriptions for $10 and sell more than 1,000 over-the-counter medicines for $4 or less. Check the list carefully. Consumers can still get most of these drugs for free in a gallon of local tap water.
School administrators across the country are cutting corners and considering lay-offs to make up for the price increase in foods for the school cafeterias. One desperate elementary school principal went so far as to ask Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke for a bailout after his school went broke because of a food fight.