The Coca-Cola Company, the world’s largest beverage firm, vowed to consumers and shareholders that it would produce 1000 varieties of Coca-Cola by 2015.
“By differentiating our brand beyond the point of recognition, we’ll ensure that there’s a Coke for literally every potential beverage market in the civilized world,” said Coke President and CEO Muhtar Kent. “Rest assured, there is no random combination of fruity syrups we won’t mix together, and no slapdash tweaking of our iconic brand that we won’t foist on thirsty consumers.”
In 2009 the Coca-Cola Company will roll out new brands including Peppermint Coke, Coca-Cola with Mango, Coca-Cola Fudge, Birthday Coke, Coca-Colada, Olive Coke, Spicy Coke, and Coca-Cola with Pepsi.
Convenience stores and supermarkets nationwide are scrambling to accommodate the additional flavors. A Piggly Wiggly spokesman said the grocer will stop selling pet food and cat litter in order to clear the necessary shelf space. Some 7-11 stores will replace restrooms with additional refrigeration units to house the increased stock of 20-ounce bottles.
Space is a concern even at Coca-Cola headquarters in Atlanta, where the company has begun construction of a three-story vending machine that will dispense all 1000 Coca-Cola varieties. Coke’s child daycare facility was demolished earlier this year to make room for the structure.
Coca-Cola stock jumped eleven cents per share after the announcement. It rose an additional twenty cents when Kent vehemently denied speculation that Coca-Cola II, or “New Coke,” would be one of the 1000 flavors.